Have you ever been in the middle of a big group of people and felt all alone? Probably all of us have. Loneliness is not necessarily a matter of having someone around us – even happily married people sometimes drift apart emotionally and wind up sharing a bed together, yet feel desperately alone.
“College is the time when everyone experiences those things such as sex and fun and pleasure. In those years I’ve had to rot in loneliness, it’s not fair.” (Day of Retribution, Elliot Rodger, Video)
The nation may have been shocked by the killings, but the thoughts Elliot Rodger expressed in video are mainstream. The views he held are held and even taught by many – that college is the time when we start using others to experience pleasure for ourselves. Sex is nothing more than a basic physiological need and it is no big deal to hook up with someone sexually to get that need met. Continue reading Sex and fun and pleasure?→
Many of you have already read the post on social media regarding the 25 year old “Ms. Pretty” who was seeking a rich husband, and the response by the CEO of J.P. Morgan.
Although a lot of people apparently enjoyed the banker putting the young lady “in her place,” but I was saddened by the whole affair. I would like to offer a more compassionate response.
Ms. Pretty is a Product of Our Society
Think about it. We live in a society where appearance is supreme. Our media continually parades women in front of our eyes wearing very little clothing and most of those on parade are stunningly pretty. A young person, such as Ms. Pretty, was raised in this meat market type of environment – and while her request for a husband who makes at least $500,000 a year in exchange for her good looks and the use of her body might seem a bit cold and calculating – in truth it is not. Continue reading To the Pretty Girl Seeking Rich Husband – A Compassionate Response→
Chances are you know of someone who met a really unbelievable person while dating – and fell heads-over-heels in “love” very quickly. The relationship was red-hot from the get-go. But soon it turned alarmingly scary.
Chances are, the unbelievable special someone was a sociopath.
What is a Sociopath?
In brief, a sociopath feels no true empathy – empathy being the capacity for caring for the feelings and well-being of others. They tend to be master manipulators to get what they want from those around them – because for the sociopath, life is about them only. Continue reading Avoid Dating Sociopaths – Deadly Dating Part 2→
The book Jane Eyre has as a central theme a scary mystery. Once the leading character, Jane, meets a man (Rochester) who finally seems to truly care for her – she finds that there is some darkly mysterious and dreadful serious problem which he is hiding in his house. She perceives there is someone there besides her who is involved with this man. And this someone seems terrifying. Continue reading Too Physical Too Soon? The Dangers of Sex in Dating→
It’s pretty common – you see a guy and a gal together quite a bit and in a moment with the guy you ask the obvious question, “So, is that your girlfriend?” To which he replies, “Um, no, we’re just talking.”
Strangely, if you ask the girl the same question, she’ll likely reply “Well, I don’t know what’s going on.” If you press her, she may even tell you how he calls her a lot, spends a lot of time talking, and even invites her to do things with him (that seem to her like dates), but she just doesn’t know where she stands. You may even see a few tears as she talks about him. Continue reading We’re Just Talking – Is That Okay?→
Welcome to sick season. Flu, strep, bronchitis, allergies, they’re all here! There’s 2 ways we could get sick: #1 We’re doing something wrong, like eating the wrong foods, not exercising, running into inanimate objects (shout out to my sister), etc. or #2 We’re being affected by that things we might not be able to control, like germs being passed to us, allergies irritating our sinuses, wonderful genetics given to us by our lovely parents, etc. Either way, we see the symptoms, and if we don’t already know a remedy, we consult a doctor. The doctor tells us not just what’s going wrong but WHY it’s going wrong. The doctor specializes in healing the hurts of life – at least physically. He looks at the symptoms and figures out the cause. Sometimes he doesn’t always know exactly what’s going wrong, but has a ballpark guess. Sometimes it takes tests and research and study to figure out what the problem is.
Something about that system is very comforting. To know that if you don’t have the answer, there is a specialist who can help you not only suspend your symptoms, but cure the cause. What an underrated and incredible experience it is to be healthy! But if you ignore the symptoms, a simple problem can turn into something very serious. No doctor can help us in healing the hurts of life if we don’t share our hurts with him. Or I’m sure you know someone who has a problem that the doctors are clueless about. They have no idea what the cause is, and in extreme cases, they might not even be able to treat the symptoms effectively. In those cases, especially with young children, we, as a group of humanity, bind together in extreme loyalty and support to help each other emotionally and sometimes financially to help with the physical.
“…I met this guy who I thought was my boyfriend…I was convinced he was my boyfriend,” relates Chong Kim. “…We were living in Dallas, Texas, and he told me about after two or three weeks of us dating, and he said to me, ‘I want to take you out of state to go meet my parents.’ And my girlfriend said that if a guy says that to you that he likes you, so there was no ‘be careful’ – none of that. I was real excited.”